How to Tell Your Children You’re Getting Divorced

children looking upset in front of angry parents

After spending a long time thinking, you’ve finally made the difficult decision to end your marriage. Telling your partner that you want a divorce will either be painful or exciting.


But when it comes to telling your children, it can seem like one of the hardest things you have to do. However, there are ways to break the news gently.

Rehearse What You Want to Say

The thought of telling your children that you and your spouse are no longer going to be married may be tough, but it's the right thing to do. However, you may not know what to say or what you want to tell your children, especially if they’re young.


Before telling your children about the divorce, rehearse everything you plan to say. If you have young children, think of a way to simplify it, so they’ll understand better.

Tell Them What’s Going to Change

In most cases of divorce, there are going to be a few drastic changes. While these changes may benefit you and your ex-spouse, the same can’t be said for your children. In fact, these changes can have a negative effect on them, especially if they’re not informed about them beforehand.


Telling them before the changes occur will mentally and emotionally prepare them. Let them know where their other parent is going, when they can visit them and how their lives will essentially remain the same.

Give Them Time

It’s important to know that divorce can cause a significant change in your children’s demeanor for some time. They might blame you, their sibling or even themselves. It’s up to both you and your partner to inform them otherwise. Reinforce the fact that the divorce had nothing to do with them.


If your children are old enough, give some details on the events that transpired to warrant a divorce, but do it in a positive way. Doing so is a great way for your children to come to terms with the divorce and accept it.


If you need assistance with your divorce or child custody case, call The Law Office of Rebecca J. Carrillo today at (210) 405-6623.